What is empathy, and why is it important? 

Key points

• Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of another person, which is core to our survival and happiness. 
• Empathy is something you can practice and get better at over time. 
• Compassion is empathy in action, which is great for those around us, and for our mental health!  

What is empathy? 

You may have heard the phrase “walk a mile in someone else’s shoes.” This describes empathy, the ability to understand and share the feelings of another person. Empathy is the glue that holds our relationships together, whether it’s a romantic relationship, a friendship, your family, or even at work. Without empathy, our communication falls flat. We need to understand and feel emotions to truly hear and understand each other. Empathy is the root from which kindness grows, and it shapes how we interact with the world. 

Why is empathy important? 

Empathy isn’t just a frilly term to throw around to sound nice, it has deep roots in human evolution. As social creatures who thrive in community, our ability to understand and share each other’s emotions is core to our survival and happiness. Empathy is also not unique to humans, but that is a story for another time. Empathy improves communication, strengthens relationships, and is the driving force behind our desire to help each other. 

How to be more empathetic

If you struggle with walking a mile in someone else’s shoes, or understanding someone else’s situation, you’re not alone, and you’re not stuck. Empathy is something that you can practice and get better at over time. Here are a few ways to sharpen your empathy skills: 

• Practice Self Awareness: To understand the feelings of others, it helps to understand your own feelings. When you feel an emotion, don’t jump to a distraction or solution. Sit with that feeling and try to identify it. What does sadness feel like? Perhaps a heaviness in your shoulders, or like you swallowed a boulder?  What does it feel like to feel joy? Do you notice butterflies in your stomach? Taking notice even for a moment can help you develop your emotional skills and self-awareness. 
• Active listening: If someone is venting to you, be fully present with them. Simply hear them out and share that you hear them, without jumping to solutions. Phrases like “That sounds incredibly difficult,” or “It makes total sense for you to feel that way,” can be very powerful in showing you empathize. 
• Taking perspective: When someone shares their experience with you, take a moment to visualize what it would be like to go through that experience yourself. What emotions come up for you? What might you need in this situation to get through it? 

Putting empathy into action

When empathy is put into action, we call that compassion. When we act with compassion, it’s not only good for the people around us, it’s great for our own mental health. Did you know that 72% of people who engage in kind acts report stronger relationships? And engaging in acts of kindness can lead to a 35% reduction in symptoms of depression? You don’t need to make huge gestures to show compassion – it can be just as powerful in everyday interactions with the people around you. 

• Carry an extra snack in your bag to share with someone in need on your commute
• Ask your neighbor how they’re doing, and actually listen to their response 
• Let someone merge in traffic, knowing you’ve been waved in before, too

A real-life story of empathy in action 

👂 Here’s a powerful story from Green Canyon High School, showing the power empathy can have when it fuels a compassionate act. 👂

Green Canyon High School’s Friday night football game turned into something far more powerful than the scoreboard. Desert Peak, a brand-new school with no seniors, trailed by more than 60 points at halftime. With only a handful of parents and no student section, their sideline was quiet, but they kept fighting. Then, midway through the third quarter, Green Canyon students surprised everyone, moving into the visiting stands, cheering loudly for Desert Peak. Soon, cheerleaders joined in, and more than 75 Green Canyon students filled the stands with energy. By the end of the game, both teams stood together, cheering side by side, showing resilience, unity, and the true spirit of high school sports.

Looking for more inspiration and encouragement? A daily reminder to show empathy can be a big help! Sign up for our pledge of kindness to get new ideas for one simple kind act per day.